For my late grandmother.

I think about the word "mahal" in Tagalog - how it translate to love.

For Candy Royalle

A note on the past few months

I'm still here. And while I'm still here, I keep wondering why - why keep going?

I am writing tonight in reflection of love.

I'm still working on it. But each day, the sun still rises. Each day, I blur lines between a beginning, middle, and end.

I've spent so long watering the garden of others. I've spent too long wondering if the grass is really greener on the other side.

I’ve realised I’ve been building a life, just not the one I really wanted for myself.

We have grown accustomed to the distance, the silence forgotten until birthday cards are sent in the mail.

Even if you could imagine you were someone else, you could never fully grasp the reality of a life outside of yours.